It’s about, oh, 2,000 pounds of steel, plastic, aluminum and other things. Her name is Sapphire and she is a 1997 Mercury Sable wagon and is midnight metalic blue and just a good little car with some spunk and guts.

Sapphire passed the rough mom test drive that included a little highway speed bursts, and some hard stopping and some weavey driving and of course a rough dirt road AND skidding to a stop in a gravel parking lot. Oh yeah, and getting a little muddy. She passed the overall body inspection, in pretty good shape, just one door ding that might even be easy enough to pop out. A few scratches here and there, but nothing a little touch up paint won’t fix. No noticable rust, and a super sweet and clean engine.

I believe she’ll treat my oldest child right. She better.

Okay, I’ll admit it publicly, right here and right now. I’m a closet car nerd. I love cars. I really do. I love certain cars, but I know a lot about them, history and styles and just odd facts. I LOVE shopping for a car. One of these days when I have a little extra folding money, I’ll probably be buying and selling cars. I like it that much. I love a good deal. I love the hunt of finding something sweet.

So when Jessy’s Dad said that he was going to get her a car, the car nerd in me squealed like a girl. (Hmmm…. you would think that my inner car nerd would probably be a girl, given that I am a girl… but I think you understand….) Oh, joy!!! That meant looking through Craig’s List and Auto Trader and watching on the side of the road and talking to my buddies Merl and Bill and all that.

Wrong. I was out of the picture. Ex-wife thing. DURN!

So I waited, patiently. Sucking every little bit of car hunt out of the stories that Jessy would tell me when they came home. Which was usually like… “Yeah, it was a car. Dad didn’t really like it.”

TELL ME MORE CHILD!!!!!

And she would just shrug and walk off. Not really into it.

After almost 3 months of this, no car, no leads, just waiting and waiting and WAITING…. I just could hardly not stand it anymore!!! I was helping to find cars, but timing was off, and they couldn’t get out to look at them, or she was just not that interested in it all.

I was beginning to think that she was NOT MY CHILD…. I mean… how could she not understand the thrill of the grill changes from 1999 to 2000 Ford Taurus? Or that 2001 was the third generation change of the popular car? Or feel the thrill of first touch of a car you were sizing up, the feel of the tire tread, checking for uneven wear and inspecting it for door rust???? MY GOSH! How could this not affect her?

Winter’s coming and I really don’t want her really learning to drive out in the cold and yucky weather. And her class schedule is getting tough on her Dad and I, and all that. The time is here, she needs a car and she needs to get her license and she needs to get experience so that she can start driving herself some and all that. It’s time. So I just asked. I asked if I could help. After all, I was the one usually finding and buying cars when we were married. We’ve had a whole fleet of old used cars… one little Toyota pickup I bought for only $200 and it gave us two good years of service! I never got a clunker. I can wheel and deal, I have good horse sense when it comes to checking out and evaluating a used car.

He agreed and the hunt was on. Less than 48 hours later… Jessy has a new car! And it was a sweet deal, knocked over $200 off the asking price, and we’re picking her up on Thursday. (Her Dad had to work tomorrow, so, well, that’s okay. I got a gig too, so it’s good…) But come Thursday, my little girl is going to own her own big old car. I am so excited!!!!

When we first got to the lot, I had a good feeling. There were 5 cars in the style she wanted there! How cool. It was pretty quick to narrow them down to two. Two of the others were just a little too much money… it was pretty clear that they wouldn’t go down enough to get close on those. Which is fine. We still had three. One we got in and immediately, felt weird. She started but it was surging and then stalled, just felt funny from the start. Passenger door wouldn’t latch, and there was just a wonky feeling from the start. I’ve learned quick, you can tell a good one by the feeling you have after about 30 seconds of just being there, in the driver’s seat. That one was not it.

The last two…. were almost identical. One was green, and one was blue. One was a Sable and one was a Taurus. She really liked the green, so we started her up and did a good walk around. Only real thing was that the radio didn’t work. Well, that’s okay. Fixable. She sounded good, engine steady. So we took her for a ride. I drove first, since Jessy is still a bit of a learner.

The green wagon was okay. She was pulling a bit to the right, and just seemed to be okay in the get up and go department, smooth, but not spectacular in any way. Brakes good, all that… but then I noticed… the speedometer was not working. Coupled with the radio issue… that starts to worry me. Electrical? Something was wonky. I pulled her over and let Jessy drive her back… she was pleased, but not like excited enough… something was missing.

We went back and got the keys for the blue wagon. Off we went. First thing I noticed? Definitely a little more pep and spunk to her. She lit out of the drive with good speed. Even spun a little gravel. On the road, straight and comfy to drive… no pulling, no wheel wobble at higher speeds, shifted nice, everything was A-OK. Gunned her a bit, and she responded. Radio and all that worked, cruise control, wipers, blowers, you name it, worked fine. Pulled her off on a dirt road and handled just fine. Brakes good, tires good. Gave Jessy a fright when I spun her out in the gravel parking lot of some saloon we turned around it. It was her turn.

And then I saw it.

The spark. The love. The desire.

She sat there a few minutes with a smile on her face and a little bit of a glint in her eye. I could see it. I could feel it. She turned and had a huge smile on her face.

“Let her go.” I said and she pulled her into gear and took off on to the blacktop, and was surprised at the little leap forward that little wagon took. Not like the big old lumpy van. She had a little kick and a little piss and vinegar to her. And right away, Jessy was feeling the love and just absorbed in the whole sensation. She was driving better than I’ve ever seen her. Watching more careful, checking her mirrors, finding good spots for her hands on the wheel, and just really getting into the whole experience.

We pulled back into the dealer and she parked her and we stood there a few moments in the silence. I just wanted to see what she would do. And to my delight, she turned and started to write “Jessy’s Car” in the dust on the hood. Then she looked at me, hoping, unsure, waiting for my approval. I just nodded and smiled. Yeah, Jessy’s car.

We went in and I did my best and got a good deal on her. Sapphire is coming home in about, oh 30 hours or so. Jessy got on the phone to call Dad and I don’t think I’ve heard her say so much in so little time. And it was good to hear him laughing and happy as well. Relieved, I think. He’s a good dad, and she’s a great daughter. I can’t wait till she gets her new baby home. And she can just sit in it and just bond with her big blue pet.

I’m pretty sure, she definitely is my daughter. She’s got the fever, it was just a little dormant and needed the right car to come along. I’m pretty sure, she’ll never forget her first car.

I know I don’t.

R.I.P. 1979 Dodge Aspen… where ever you are in car heaven!

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